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The Educator Within: When Repeating the Past Creates Roadblocks By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi March 27, 2020 Awareness hit me like a lightening blot this past Thanksgiving.  My life was upside down, literally.  We were in the middle of a kitchen remodel.  Cabinets were torn out, a sink was missing, and the crew took my old oven away.  No oven, no "traditional" Thanksgiving meal.  Yet, despite the facts in front of me I attempted to forge ahead with Thanksgiving.  The roasted turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans, and of course pumpkin pie.  Up went my creative energy.  Use a crockpot for the turkey instead of the oven, buy a pie instead of baking one, etc.  And then it melted away.  I awoke on Thanksgiving morning and realized my plan to save Thanksgiving simply wasn't going to happen, nor would it be festive or enjoyable.  I set aside the template for the holiday enshrined in my mind since my earliest memories, and called good fr...

The Nudge: What Pushes Us to Update or Create an Estate Plan By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi March 24, 2020 An estate plan, it's something most American adults know they should have.  Yet, many put it off.  From what I've read it is less about embracing the idea of illness and death, and more of an inability to wrap their minds around the financial pieces of their life.  What pushes them over the hump from having it on their mental to-do list and actually have one signed and tucked away?  A nudge. Until recently those nudges fell into certain groups for clients: Travel, especially international travel; Stage 4 cancer diagnosis; Birth of a child; Imminent retirement; or Watching the mess unfold from a loved one who had died without a plan. As of this week I can add: Pandemic. My heart goes out to the various callers I have talked to this week.  From those with parents in their 80s who do not have plans, to those expecting a first child, to thos...

What I've Been Reading Friendship: The Evolution, Biology and Extraordinary Power of Life's Fundamental Bond by Lydia Denworth By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi, March 2020 But for the persistence of a close friend, the client would have died.  That was the take-away from a client meeting I had a year or so ago.  Like many people, the client was older, single and lived alone.  Contrary to the client's normal ways, a Saturday evening dinner was canceled because the client was under the weather. The next morning the client called in sick to teach Sunday School, and upon hearing this news the client's astute and caring friend new something was amiss and showed up at the client's door.  Visibly disoriented, the client's friend knew medical attention was needed.  Refusing the astute friend to call 911, the client agreed to be driven to the ER.  And then the client's memory fades to black. Afterwards the ER doctor told the client "had you stayed at home one ...