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Series: Estate Plannings Hardest Questions #6: Asking Yourself 'Who is Family?' By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi Every now and then I'll have a client lean in during our first meeting, where we discuss their life situation and estate planning goals, and nearly whispers "can I name someone other than my relatives?" "Of course, estate planning is about taking control and nominating the people who are right for the job!" I proclaim. In the various seminars I give on the topic of estate planning and probate I emphasize the need to ask yourself "who is your family?  We share our DNA and branches of a family tree with a group of people.  We also share life with a group of people; the joyous celebrations, the mundane tasks of life, and the times of despair.  Sometimes they are the same group of people, and sometimes they are two distinct groups. Personally, I am one who has two different groups.  With the exception of my spouse and children, there a...

Series: Estate Plannings Hardest Questions #5 - Answering 'What If They All Die?' By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi It begins with the question "Am I correct to assume you want all assets to pass to the surviving spouse?" Without hesitation, both clients respond "yes." I return with "And if both of you were to die, either together or one and the other, you want your assets to be shared equally among your children." Again, without hesitation the clients in unison state "yes." This time I volley with "and if a child of yours were to predecease you, would his or her share pass to any children he or she may have left?" My question is often met with a pause and a head snapping back as though it had been slapped.  Looking at one another and then me, the clients stammer "well....well....yes, I guess that seems appropriate."  As a mother as well as a lawyer I can see the glimpse of horror in the clients' eyes; pa...

Series: Estate Plannings Hardest Questions #4 Where Should I Keep My Will? By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi "Well, let's put ink to paper and make this will legally binding" I say to a client in our final meeting.  Pens are passed around, pages are initialed, the witnessing completed.  I slide the will into the kelly green folder each client receives to hold his or her completed forms.  The client, with eyes downcast on the desk puts the papers in order, and digests the fact they did it -- they completed or updated a will.  Slowly the client's eyes move upward, connecting with mine, and then the question -- "now where do I keep this?"  Puzzlement clearly written across the face. Copies of powers of attorney should hold the same legal authority as the original, however, that is not likely the case with a will.  It is very important to keep the original safe.  Many clients assume the safe deposit box is the answer.  What used to be the go-to...

Recently I read The Green Burial Guidebook: everything you need to plan an affordable, environmentally friendly burial by Elizabeth Fournier .  It was a segment on WPR's Central Time that led me to this interesting book. At a slender 150 pages, the book is a straightforward and easy read, complete with detailed notes and resources at the end.  Fournier first introduces the reader to the concept of "what is a green funeral" and then in the second half provides a guide to a green burial.  For those already familiar with the go green movement in the area of funerals, the first half of the book may be repeat information.  However, in the second half of the book Fournier takes the reader well beyond having a burial minus the coffin and vault, into various "shades of green" as she calls the spectrum of options available to making their death affordable and earth friendly. There is detailed information for those with families that can provide preparation of a b...

Series: Estate Plannings Hardest Questions By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi #3 - Who to Name as Personal Representative Wisconsin is my home state, meaning we use the term "Personal Representative" (hereafter "PR") instead of the more commonly known "Executor".  The role of the PR is to file a will with the court, collect the deceased person's probate assets, pay the final taxes, funeral and medical costs, and any other liabilities of the deceased.  The PR distributes the remainder to the beneficiaries as stated in the will, or if no will, follows state statute on disbursing funds.  This is an oversimplified version of the work required of a PR, but it provides the general gist of the work involved. Knowing the type of work involved, and the fact a probate on average takes 12-18 months from start to finish, you can develop a good sense of the skill-set required by the person you nominate to by the PR.  I do not recommend a knew-jerk reaction and name...

Estate Plannings Hardest Questions Two of Six -- Who to Name as Guardian of Minor Children By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi Contemporary parenting is full of reminders that some children may face a future without both parents at his or her side.  From Cinderella to Harry Potter, children's books and movies regularly set an orphan out on a life adventure, weaving an exciting story with plenty of milestones.  While it may be a common writing technique, the idea of orphans can leave many a parent feeling vulnerable -- who would raise our (my) child(ren) if we/I die?  It's a question that, depending on your emotional fortitude, can feel like a punch to the stomach.  But again, in my opinion it is one a parent should face, decide, and put in a legally binding format (laws differ state to state, and day to day, please consult with an attorney for up-to-date advice relevant to your state of residence).  Without answering this question yourself, it may lead to a disp...

Series:  Estate Plannings Hardest Questions One of Six -- Who will be my back-up agent for Power of Attorney by Melinda Gustafson Gervasi Control, it is the central part of estate planning.  When you sit down to create or update an estate plan you are taking control of the situation.  You have the ability to say who will do what tasks, and you will say where will your assets will go when you are gone.  One piece of estate planning is the nomination of an agent and back-up agent for your power of attorney for health care as well as your power of attorney for finance (these documents say who can make decisions in these areas if you are alive, but to sick to act).  In my experience it is relatively easy for people to name the primary agent, but when it comes to picking a back-up, things can get dicey. married couple has three adult children, which child should they name; childless clients (single or married), a dear friend would be nice but the person is...

When you hit a certain age you can bet on receiving some sort of invite in the mail offering you a free dinner at lovely restaurant close to your home, served with a side lecture on 101 ways to avoid probate.  Now I love a free meal, but proceed with caution, it  may be a trust mill. What's a trust mill?  It's usually an LLC that sets up shop in an area for several months, fires off a mass mailing to people over a certain age, gives you free food and attempts to scare you into a Living Revocable Trust.  This sales pitch is likely to contain lies, all designed to get you to sign up for a $5,000 or more trust document.  And chances are fairly good the speakers are not attorneys. I'm not alone in my dislike of trust mills.  This was recently posted on a Wisconsin Estate Planners Listserve: "Thought all you fine people should know the truth:  I have a nice lady whose elderly parents are about to become victims of a trust mill.  These fine folks ...

Think Children's Literature and Estate Planning lessons do not go hand in hand? Think again.  This phenomenon first hit me in 2014 when I watched Disney's film Cinderella with my then preschool aged children.  As I said then in a blog post , if you are a parent without a will nominating a guardian for your child(ren) and setting up a children's trusts, watch Cinderella and you'll find your motivation. Each new year of parenting has brought changes: diapers are a thing of the past, larger and larger bowls of oatmeal are required for the kids' breakfast, and the books and films they digest grow in complexity.  In the Treasure Hunters Series by Jams Patterson four adolescent siblings navigate the world of espionage and foreign seas in the midst of parents lost at sea.  Pulling his nose from the book my son raised a question -- "mom, what's 'their legal guardian' mean?"  Most recently it was Roald Dahl's Matilda that caused me to anal...

It is not often that I find one book that captures so many of my core interests, but I hit the trifecta with The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter by Margareta Magnusson.  This little book hits on my key interests: one, it relates to my practice of estate planning and probate administration; two, it nourishes my frugal lifestyle; and three, it feeds my obsession with the Nordic way of life.  Billed the next big fad to hit the US, Swedish Death Cleaning means to remove unnecessary things from your home, making the home orderly and nice at the time you depart Mother Earth.  At just over 100 pages, the book is a light-hearted memoir of the author’s later life when she “death cleaned” following the passing of loved ones.  Sprinkled throughout the book are suggestions for motivating yourself to get started and completing the act of taking control of your personal items to declare what is meaningful a...