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Red, White, and True Independence: Why Turning 18 Requires More Than Just a Vote By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi July 3, 2026 Image by M. Gustafson Gervasi 2026 The Summer of 2026 holds to significant birthdays for me.  First, our nation turns 250 years old.  As a member of the legal profession, I hope we see renewed reverence for the rule of law, and strengthen our democratic institutions.  Second, my oldest child turns18 in late summer.  Both of these events cause my mind to think about independence, duty and responsibility that culminate in a desire to educate young adults on a key task they should consider completing on our near their birthday. Turning 18 ushers in a new chapter of your life, heavily dosed with a helping of independence. You can vote, sign up for the selective service, and sign contracts. You are officially an adult in many aspects of life.  However, with this independence comes a responsibility. Many families are surprised to learn that with t...

What Makes a Good Estate Plan? Being Organized By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi March 12, 2021 What is that old saying, life happens suddenly on a Tuesday morning?  For me, life happened on a Friday morning earlier this month.  Settling down on our sofa with a hot cup of coffee and a new book, my plan was to start the day reading.  Then the phone rang.  Yes, an actual call.  "Husband" flashed across the screen.   Me: "Hey, what's up?  Did you find your wallet? Husband: "......Melinda?" came a dazed voice,  unlike my spouse's energetic way of speaking. Me: "What's the matter?" came out of my mouth as my gut told me something was wrong. Husband: "um, um,.....I fell off of my bike".  After 16 years together the call I dreaded had arrived.  I am married to a bike commuter, and year-round bike commuter.  The weather had just begun to warm up and he had returned to his 8 mile bike ride to work, using the recommended studded tires.  ...

What I've Been Reading Friendship: The Evolution, Biology and Extraordinary Power of Life's Fundamental Bond by Lydia Denworth By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi, March 2020 But for the persistence of a close friend, the client would have died.  That was the take-away from a client meeting I had a year or so ago.  Like many people, the client was older, single and lived alone.  Contrary to the client's normal ways, a Saturday evening dinner was canceled because the client was under the weather. The next morning the client called in sick to teach Sunday School, and upon hearing this news the client's astute and caring friend new something was amiss and showed up at the client's door.  Visibly disoriented, the client's friend knew medical attention was needed.  Refusing the astute friend to call 911, the client agreed to be driven to the ER.  And then the client's memory fades to black. Afterwards the ER doctor told the client "had you stayed at home one ...

Image by M. Gustafson Gervasi, 2013 May started out for me be attending an event at the local courthouse.  May 1st marked Law Day, celebrating the legal profession, offered free continuing legal education for attorneys, and of course there was cake.  Inspired after listening to a session entitled Lincoln - A Lawyer for the Ages, I returned to my office.  There I found the monthly newsletter from the Dane County Bar Association.  Included was a piece about May being National Mental Health Month, and the fact that members of the legal profession suffer from depression, stress, anxiety, and suicide at levels higher than the average population.  This was a fact I knew. What struck me was mention that both President Lincoln as well as Fighting Bob LaFollette, both members of the profession, suffered from bouts of depression over the course of their lives and careers.  In the week that followed headlines broke stating that the suicide rate among middle aged ...

Image by M. Gustafson Gervasi, 2013 -- Keeping Cool in the summer sun May 8th -- just a typical day for most people, but in my family we celebrate my husband's birth.  So, of course my post today plays off of his years growing up in the Sunshine State -- where "everyone has a dermatologists". May, the month of my husband's birth is also National Skin Cancer Awareness Month, a fact that came to my attention when reading a newsletter from our local hospital.  It offers 9 steps to reduce exposure.  For example, avoid being in the sun during peak hours, 10am - 4pm.  Where clothing that covers your skin, including a hat.  Click here for the complete list of ways to reduce the risk of skin cancer . Avoiding the sun from 10-4 makes sense, but how practical is it?  I cannot help but remember my summers growing up in Madison, and all of the t-ball practices and games I had smack dab in the middle of the afternoon!

Image by M. Gustafson Gervasi, 2013 -- Door Co., Wisconsin  It's that time of year.  Daylight last a little longer, snow begins to melt, spring bulbs search for blue sky, and people seek warmer locales to spend 5 to 7 days relaxing.  Spring breakers travel checklists most likely include: set up pet sitter, cancel newspaper, get spending money, pack swimsuit, etc..  And then there are lawyers who travel, especially estate planning lawyers.  Before we head out the door, there are a few things that come to mind: A copy of the power of attorney for health care -- the document that gives another person authority to make medical decisions if I am not able to.  My documents were drafted here in Wisconsin, and should be recognized in any state where I am traveling.  Just as they'd recognize my marriage license, they should recognize this legal form.  Without one on hand, it becomes a scavenger hunt if I am sick or hurt.  It is on my "pack lis...

Image credit:  www.sxc.hu - free image It's February 14th, and that means it is Valentine's Day.  Reason enough for a shorter, more whimsical post. So I turned to Brainy Quotes.  No, this one is not dripping in sweet sentiments.  It's from Lewis Black. "What I find most disturbing about Valentine's Day is, look, I get you have a have a holiday of love, but in the height of flu season, it makes no sense." - Lewis Black And from that I will provide you with a link the the CDC's six recommendations on avoiding the flu : Avoid close contact; Stay home if you are sick; Cover your mouth and nose; Clean your hands; Avoid touching your eyes, nose, mouth; and Practice other healthy behavior (drink water, exercise, etc.) Enjoy this day devoted to love, in the midst of flu season!  I'll be back tomorrow with more serious thoughts on illness, death and taxes for the middle class. 

Earlier today I waited patiently in the exam room for a doctor.  I questioned the visit, but in the end was happy I went.  Turns out that at age 39 I had an ear infection.   And according to the doctor, if you were a baby you'd be screaming your head off!   While waiting I noticed that the wall calendar was compliments of Agrace Hospice care.  Odd choice for a family doctor's office.  Not the exact message I may want, or maybe it was an intentional reminder that we all face the same destination. Beyond treating my inflamed ear, I was interviewing this doctor to be my primary care physician as I prepare to enter a new decade, and tackle the new health standards that will follow.  Yes, you read that correctly, I was interviewing her.  Will we work together, etc.  My decision to screen doctors was reinforced this past week when reading the 3-part series in the Wisconsin State Journal about medical malpractice and other horrors.  More t...

Image credit:  www.sxc.hu - free image Shame on me, no flu shot this year.  The reasons why are worth examination.  Knowing the obstacles might just increase the chances of more vaccinations in years to come. I'm not pregnant nor are my children one and under.  Yes, I admit that while bringing new life into this world I was more exacting with my health.  I ate right, slept more, avoided caffeine, and got a flu shot; Walk-in clinics at Target and other pharmacies aren't exactly easy.  Most trips include having my children in tow (imagine shopping with Thing One and Thing Two from a Dr. Seuss book), so my focus is to get in, get our stuff, and get out.  Making a stop that requires me removing the layers we all wear here in the Upper Midwest to receive a shot is not easy.  And if it is not easy, well, it slides on my priority list....even though it should not; My doctor's office requires an appointment.  Seriously?  If there were ...

January in Wisconsin translates to many things: snow plows, Packer Play-off hopes, golf courses transformed into cross-country ski wonderlands, and kids zooming down hills on sleds.  Of course, three of the four depend on there being lots of snow on the ground (okay, maybe the Packers' Play-off hopes depend on that too).  So when this past weekend we saw the forecast for the week ahead calling for temperatures in the low 40's combined with rain, we knew that Sunday must be a day for sledding.  We had not managed to get the kids out yet this year, and the hill would likely be turned into a expanse of slush and mud with the warm up. Mission accomplished.  Adorable in their snow suits, hats, mittens and boots, our children squealed with delight as they zoomed down an icy hill into a field of fluffy flying snow.  "Again!" they shouted.  For a good hour we drudged up the hill, and then shot down like a rocket.  We were not alone on the hill, many families...

It is not uncommon to find out an attorney is also a self-declared book worm.  A love of reading is almost a requirement to get one through three years of law school.  And most of us emerge from those three years with an even stronger desire to read, but to read things that are not about the law.  That was my case, but I have since resigned to the fact that my area of focus, illness, death and taxes creeps into the arts more often than not. Case in point, while visiting the library recently I spied a slim novella on a shelf written by Richard Russo.  His earlier work, Empire Falls is a favorite of mine, so without thinking I dropped it in our check out bag and headed home.   Intervention is a total of 67 pages, , I thought to myself, wonderful -- a story I can get through in no time!  That turned out to be true (I finished it in two days), but by page 12 or so it was clear that the undercurrent to this story was a cancer diagnosis.  Entertainmen...

Over the weekend I read a brief news story about a new program in Madison - walk with a doctor .  The concept is quite simple.  Take a nature walk, in a local park, with a doctor.  The idea promotes an active lifestyle, and gives physicians a chance to educate in a more relaxed environment.  Each walk has a topic as well, such as weight loss surgery. As the parent of young children, I'd love to see some walks geared towards your nation's youth.  Let's think preventive medicine by getting kids interested in walks through the woods.  I try to do this on my own, but taking a 4 and 2 year old for a nature walk is.....well a bit stressful at times.  How can our medical profession makes this easier for me?  Might a future walk address this question?  Having something other than pricey procedures and the latest prescription would be refreshing. I don't mean to be critical, but I am an attorney after all and that is my training.  I am thankf...

Earlier this week a mass email was sent out to the members of Prairie UU, where my husband and I are members.  Often times the messages relate to a request for assistance with yard work while recovering from surgery, announcing a birth/marriage/death in a family, or spreading the word about a great movie playing in theaters.  This email contained a link to a NY Times article reviewing a recent study published in JAMA . Researchers have shown that loneliness in people age 60 and older is a predictor of functional decline and death.  According to the study, chronic loneliness is connected to a host of health concerns (high blood pressure, coronary disease, etc.).  And interestingly, many of those who reported being lonely were married or living with someone; alone does not mean you are lonely.  For those seeking to age with grace or keeping a watchful eye on a elder in the family, this article is highly informative.   The bottom line I took from the article...

Last week my mother entered the Emergency Room, and as is usually the case in her situation, she was admitted and has had a lengthy stay.  Widowed, she lives alone with her two cats, one of which is diabetic and requires shots twice a day.  My mother's emergency hospital stay unveiled a gap in our family's care support team....a quality pet sitter.  We now have one, and I urge you to give this some advance thought if you or a loved one has a pet, especially one with special needs.  What will happen to the pet in the event of an unexpected hospital stay?   Here are a few tips on locating someone to join your team; contact: a local rescue organization for names of pet sitters; local veterinary school or vet tech program; post a query on Facebook or other social media; send an email to a list serve through your place of worship; and post an ad on care.com .

Planning a fall getaway?  This time of year many folks take a long weekend to enjoy fall colors or simply escape the routine of life before the snow flies and travel is more hazardous.  If so, one item you may want to add to your "packing list" is a copy of your most recent power of attorney for health care.  Having a hard copy or electronic version (check to make sure these are allowed under the law of the state where you live) can save hours if not more should you find yourself in the ER.  Without proper documents your traveling partner may have no legal right to make decisions for you, even if s/he is your spouse. Image credit:  www.sxc.hu - free image

Over the long weekend I finished the book Confessions of a Surgeon: the good, the bad, and the complicated...life behind the OR door s by Paul A. Ruggieri, MD.   It was a fantastic book! Well written, honest, insightful, and a bit scary because it gives you a glimpse into the ORs of modern day America. I am very happy I read this AFTER having had two c-sections. I also found the book highly informative, and am now well armed with questions should I or a loved one need to hire a surgeon. For example, I want to know the surgeons complication rate for the procedure. If they respond "none" I now know they are a) lying to me to cover something up, or 2) have not done nearly enough of these to be a skilled surgeon. I certainly don't want to be their first complication. Through error wisdom is born. The only negative thing about the book were a few parts where the author was recounting a conversation, often during surgery. To me the recount seemed more op-ed than the t...

Being a bookworm and an attorney often go hand in hand.  Adolescents who love reading often take an academic path laden with words. That was me.  As a child books were my dearest possessions.  College, grad school and finally law school brought me endless texts to read.  Even though the years of tuition and exams have ended, my love of reading remains. Something about the combination of my focus area (estate planning and probate), my parents poor health, and the fact I'm the parent of two young children results in many of the books on my bedside table being about health.  So when I read a short review of The End of Illness by David B. Agus, MD in my USC Alumni magazine, I requested a copy from the library.  Apparently many others had too because it was months before I got an email saying it was available. Once I picked it up I couldn't put it town.  It offers serious science, public policy, and action points, making it one of the most powerful ...

TV, especially Reality TV, are not common in my life.  I prefer books, papers and blogs to the tube, but I did see an article (in the paper) about an interesting new show.   Push Girls , affiliated with the Sundance Channel is a 14 part series exploring the lives of several women who are paralyzed through injury or illness.  The series will follow them as the exercise, date, work, and perform other everyday tasks.  The article also states that in conjunction with the Reeve Foundation, it is working to fund raise for more research. If you check it out, please comment and let me know if it is worth tracking down on netflixs! It aired June 4th.

I always say that estate planning is three things, planning for illness, death and taxes.  Three things none of us will avoid.  When it comes to illness, or incapacity, I think the following documents are essential (if you live in Wisconsin): power of attorney for health care; living will; power of attorney for finance; and authorization for final disposition. The power of attorney for health care empowers someone to speak for you when medical decisions need to be made and you are not able to respond.  A living will, also called a declaration to physicians, conveys your thoughts on end of life care to your medical team (i.e. if you are at the end of life, do you want a respirator).  The power of attorney for finance appoints someone to handle financial matters if you cannot.  Do no assume that an adult child or spouse can simply stand in for you.  They most likely cannot sign your taxes, talk with your employer about payment, handle matters related...

We are ending the week with a short pop quiz here at Illness, Death and Taxes for the Middle Class .  Here you go! Question Number One -- When is National Stroke Awareness Month? January May December Answer - May Question Number Two -- What is the leading cause of long-term disability for adults in the US? Cancer Auto accidents Stroke Answer - Stroke Question Number Two -- What is the nation's 3rd leading killer in the US? Drug overdose Cancer Stroke Answer - Stroke Learn more about how to recognize and prevent strokes at my hospital's web site .  Thanks to the Outreach Team at Meriter for sharing this vital information.  Awareness is key to a vibrant future. Image credit: www.sxc.hu - free image