More than Just a Movie: What Manchester by the Sea Teaches Us About Guardianship

More than Just a Movie: What Manchester by the Sea Teaches Us About Guardianship

By Melinda Gustafson Gervasi

September 26, 2025

Scanning the shelf of recently returned DVDs at my local library branch my eyes landed on the film Manchester by the Sea.  A faint memory clicked in my brain; this was a film I had wanted to see.  I added it to my stack of library materials, checked out, and headed home.  Looking up the film I learned that in 2017 it was nominated for 6 Oscars, including best picture.  Actor Casey Affleck won for best actor, and writer and director Kenneth Lonergan was awarded Best Original Screenplay.

As the end credits ran, it was obvious why the film had garnered critical acclaim. The film tells the story of Lee Chandler, a Boston janitor who becomes the sole guardian of his teenage nephew, Patrick, after his brother, Joe, unexpectedly dies from a heart condition.  Lee returns to his hometown of Manchester, Massachusetts, to handle Joe's funeral arrangements and is surprised to discover that his brother named him as Patrick's legal guardian in his will.

The movie's central conflict revolves around this legal designation. Lee, emotionally scarred by a past family tragedy, is reluctant to take on the responsibility. He initially tries to find a way to avoid the guardianship, suggesting that Patrick live with a family friend or even his estranged mother. However, Patrick is adamant about staying in his hometown, where he has friends, a girlfriend, and a life he doesn't want to leave behind.

The legal weight of Joe's will is a constant presence. It's the reason Lee has to stay in Manchester and confront his past. The will's provision ensures that Patrick's care is legally entrusted to a family member, reflecting Joe's wishes. The film highlights how a will isn't just a document for distributing assets; it's a critical tool for protecting a minor's well-being and a way for parents to ensure their children are cared for by someone they trust. It also poignantly illustrates the immense personal and emotional burden that can accompany the legal responsibility of a guardianship. The central dilemma of the movie is whether Lee will be able to overcome his grief and accept this role, fulfilling his brother's wishes and providing a stable home for his nephew.  I will not spoil the ending for you in case you opt to watch it yourself.

Storytelling entertains us, allows us to bond and connect, and it provides education.  Manchester by the Sea is a powerful reminder that when nominating a person in your will to be the guardian of your minor child(ren), be realistic.  Is this something that person can handle, and handle well?  This is not the time for Pollyannaish thinking; be realistic. Here are some factors to consider when deciding who is the right guardian, and successor, named in your will:

• Does the person share similar views to you on the rhythm of daily life, religion, finances, and education?
• Does the person have sufficient time to welcome your child(ren) to their home and daily life?  
• What sort of relationship does this person currently have with your child(ren).  Are they close enough for trust and safety to be felt by a child going through a crisis?
• For older kids (think 12 and up), who would they want to live with if a guardian were needed?  For many teens the bonds with school friends and teammates can be strong and powerful.  Sometimes a blood relative is not the best fit for a teen bonded with their tight-knit friend group.

From my perspective as an estate planning and probate attorney I see many couples come into to create a first estate plan AFTER the kids have left the home.  Oftentimes it was indecision or conflict about naming a guardian that prevented them from doing a will earlier.  “We couldn’t settle on a guardian, so we just avoided doing a plan.  Now the kids are older, and we don’t have that blockage.”  I get it, I’m a parent.  No one person will be the perfect fit during an unthinkable time.  Yet, if the unthinkable happens, a will is the legal way to tell the court who should step in.  Parents are likely the best suited people to make that decision.  Look at your options, be realistic, and make it legally binding by signing a will. 

I highly recommend the film Manchester by the Sea.  The storytelling is powerful, it will make you think, and it will make you feel.  It will also spark quality discussions about a critically important decision parents make. 

Please keep in mind that a blog is not legal advice.  Use it to foster discussion and reflection.  For legal advice specific to your situation, consult an attorney licensed in the state where you live.  If you find this post helpful, consider sharing it on your favorite social media platform. Thanks for reading, be well.